That is interesting Kirk. Max likes to play music and I can imagine that one day his desire to play music may inspire him to be out there more with people. I think it is great that you have found both a way and a place to fit in in a public format. I think they are lucky to count you among their number. Linda

Kirk - your post was really interesting.


Good for you. I guess the more you do something the easier it becomes.

I get the impression the musical society as well as helping you, adds hugely to your enjoyment of life.

My husband has a passion for surfing - and I guess when I think about it surfers in some ways almost have a culture of their own - clothes,language and a few other things - much in the same way goths do - I suppose.

It's interesting you say that Ellen, I have found that the more one does something, that it almost becomes natural and you can do it almost on automatic, no matter how hard it is.

Two years ago I was in a play/musical that required us all to remain on stage and act natural through out the entire show, aside from one intermission, we were playing the part of prosioners in a prison. By the end of the run, of the show, i no longer had even a tiny bit of any stage fright of any sport, before I was very awair when I had to perform anything on stage, but that show hugely desenseatised me.Simularly, in learning magic, the moves that were so hard at the start as well as timeing for my magic skills eventually became second nature to me, so i can make any object appear or disappear with out any effort or thought, compared to at the start it was a huigh feat of coordination.

Kirk.

I have no sense of style.

Clothes for me are practical items only. They need to be practical, hardwearing, lots of pockets etc etc.

Sometimes when Im really hypervigilant/paranoid i make a habit of wearing darkish clothes to aid blending in at night time.

in school, i dressed goth. ppl thought i was weird to begin with, so i dressed in a way to get me the attention i could control. nobody associated with me in school, but dressing goth meant i controled them not wanting too. circular logic. But the friends who i did make (the other goths) we so open about who i was. best choice i made.

i now dress for who i need to be. More business like if i need to switch on my business personaility... casual if i'm being laid back, ect. i find it easier to act appropriately if i'm dressed appropriately.

I use music to sway my moods to where i need to be too. I can rev myself up or bring myself down pretty quickly with a couple songs.

lol, it's all about control to me!

Panthossette, I understand that, despite the goth style does not mean I dress in leather al the time but no matter what style i dress in I adapt my colouring to suit it. For example when I dress Business, the suit is a black pinstripe, with a black shiney tie and shirt, though i do alternate. I wear a long cashmere Jacket when it's cold, my long leather coat is saved for when i gfo out to music or gigs when i need my style to be a bit more outragious. For christmas I have been wearing a crushed velvet frock coat.
That music swaying your mood idea is a colclusion I have also come to.I was feeling bad at one point some time agin and happened to put on an upbeat Cd in the car and found that it actually broght up my mood.

Of course some goths paint there room black, that would just be insane, no matter how positivbe you are the psycological effect of being sorouned by black are very bad, wearing it is one thing, but I think people liveing in dull coulours will sooner or later want to kill themselves.

Kirk.

When I was about twelve, perhaps due to bullying, I started becoming more self-conscious, and began concealing my arms and legs inside my clothes- by which I mean I stopped wearing T-shirts and shorts. I had very little sense of style, and if my mother told me, "Those clothes don't match" or "they're out of date", my simple answer was "I like them". As time went on, although I did get better at colour-coordination, my clothes were no more "in". As an adult, my dress-sense has been described as a cross between that of a gentleman farmer, a lord on a stag-hunt and a middle-aged man going out to walk his dog. At the moment I am doing Theatre Studies at university, and although I am not at all into parties or Hallowe'en, like Kirk when I get involved in plays I do like to dress up. I am hoping to stage a performance of Doctor Faustus this semester. That's quite a "Gothic" play as well.