It seems that they are looking into ALL areas of AS these days - gotta love that!

Linda

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/main.jhtml?xml=/health/2008/04/06/st_aspergers.xml

One comment in the article reminded me of why the AS self-diagnosis has been so liberating for me.

My wife enjoys parties. Since I value her enjoyment, I tried to participate. For reasons that I didn't really understand myself, I found myself getting really stressed out.

Feeling guilty for depriving her of her social function, I'd tend to exaggerate those of my stress symptoms that sounded like acceptable excuses to leave.

Now, armed with an understanding of AS, I no longer feel so guilty about asking to leave, and she understands better that when I say I'm too stressed out, that's it.

The real benefit for both of us is that now I no longer feel so guilty, and I don't worry that when I tell her I have to leave she,ll argue about it, I feel less stressed, so I can stay longer. Since she's happier, she has even come up to me and asked how I'm doing, and will I want to leave soon.

There's much truth in the old Roosevelt line "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." Knowledge and understanding tend to reduce fear.

With us in the beginning of our marriage I stayed home because my husband did not want to go places and was very unhappy. So then I started begging him to go with me and he did and he was unhappy. Now I always invite him but am just fine going on my own and we are both happy.

Linda

hi,

been while.

that article touches on quite a bit; that's not surprising in light of its address of the experiences of being: love, self with the impetus of a social nature, those experiences within the intimate experiences/dynamics between a man and a woman, ranges within mind/personality and some of their characteristics (opening to clinical observation), and modern social norms/expectations (did i leave anything out?).

the last sentence in the article leaves me with the last thought from the article and, as i think it involved with something important that i've seen here and there relating to self and others, it is what i'll address.

the guy says "I'd like to know at the end of my life that there's been one person who got me."

seeing him realize his life at the end of his life, how do you suppose he'd feel if he discovered there actually was "one person who got" him, but that he had never understood anyone else - 1 to 0 to put it as a score.

how do you suppose he'd feel realizing how many times people had tried to make themselves understood by him but had failed because he had stopped trying to understand?

if you think that a waste, you'll agree: on the spectrum or not, never stop trying to understand what you do not understand about others.


regards,

Good to see you back. Nice post... something to think about for sure.

Peace

thanks.

how is your son doing?


regards,
]